Sewing for Isaiah Yang Hood

January 2009,  found me in Charlotte, North Carolina, watching the Charlotte Bobcats beat the Boston Celtics in overtime.  On the moaning and groaning return trip home with my NBA freak of nature guys, I did what all designing women do with their sports minded men....watched for discount cloth shop roadsigns.   Nothing takes the adrenaline rush down for men quicker than than a woman saying, "Stop at this exit, there is a cloth shop.  I must feel the fabric!"  You can imagine their excitement.  

Upon entering the little establishment, I found displayed before me new spring fabrics.  Being in the midst of a grey, bleak winter, the spring colors immediately enchanted my senses and sparked my creativity.  An hour later, I happily departed with my four yards of French Country that would eventually get tucked away in to my junk heap tidy closet to be noticed on occasion with the nagging thought, "When the time is right, I'll make something special with this material."

A year and three weeks later the time became "right" when this status update appeared on my Facebook homepage:  "Hey FB friends! We are having a fundraiser night and silent auction on March 8, from 5-9 pm. Anyone have any fabulous ideas for donations for the auction? I need some help!!! Let me know what you think and if you have connections or can donate something. Thanks friends..."  

Precious childhood friends (read an antic) with whom I keep in contact, are in the process of a third international adoption.  They are fundraising to "Bring Home Isaiah".  I knew immediately for what the material was meant to be used.  I set to work.  Here are the results from the last forty-eight hours.....

Reversible Bib Apron

Double Stacked Pocket with Rosettes

Fruity Organdy Cocktail Apron

I lined the organdy with a lovely yellow cotton and

also used the cotton for the wasitband, ties, and bias.

Would I bake a Cherry Pie in this?   You bet!

The fact that I love to SEW,

added to the fact I love to GIVE,

added to the fact that I'm helping a FRIEND

and a CHILD,

equals large amounts of JOY!!!!!!!

These will be shipped Priority Mail tomorrow and I pray they bring a generous amount.

Thanks for reading, Rosie.

Adoption Is Not For Sissies! Part Two

I have a childhood friend who adopted a little girl from China about three years ago. She blogged her family’s story from the beginning and their story was and continues to be a wonderful blessing to others and me. I knew nothing about adoption before following her story. I know much more now, but I still have many questions. Recently, I e-mailed her and said, "Hey, what do you think about doing this, if I have questions, others do too. Let me use my blog as a platform to share what you know." I do not pretend to be “the blog where you go to find information regarding adoption,” there are many more well written blogs in the sphere that already exist. However, every life touches another life in some way. What may reach someone through one avenue, may not reach another. Divine appointments are what I call them. My goal is to reach one person but one person may be the catalyst for ten others; thus, my series on “Adoption Is Not For Sissies." If you missed Part One, you can catchup here. I apologize to my friend that Part Two is later than intended.

God directed you to China to adopt. What did you do next? Make me knowledgeable.

If you feel led to adopt internationally, you must be willing to do your homework. There are decisions to be made that should not be attempted until you do your research. I love researching what is “out there” and this task provided me with hours of “fun”!

What did you research first?

Choosing an adoption agency should be your first priority. Here are some factors to consider when looking for an agency:

Do they have an international or domestic program?
Do I want to work with a local agency, or am I willing to work with an
out-of-state agency?
Do they sponsor a country from where I would consider adoption?
Are they reputable?
What are others saying about that agency?
Request an information packet from that agency.
Are their clients happy with the services they provide?
Are their fees comparable to other agencies?
How long have they been in business?
How old is the specific program in which you are interested?
How many children are successfully adopted through their program?

Research, research, research is the name of the game. The best information that you can possibly get is from others who have adopted through that agency. If you do not know anyone, ask the agency for some references. Of course, expect to receive only the most positive people with agency references. I narrowed down my top three agencies and requested information from each agency. It is a laboring process to choose an agency and many people choose too quickly with later regrets. Do not make that choice without filling yourself with information and knowledge.

An agency has been chosen. Now what do I do, young old friend?

After you reach a decision about an agency, the fun really begins! International adoption is about paperwork! Lots and lots of paperwork! Honestly, the paperwork can be extremely overwhelming. It seems endless at times. One thing that may surprise you about adoption is how your life suddenly becomes an open book to your agency. This is their job; but wow, it can seem intrusive. You must lay your life uncensored on the table. You will be fingerprinted for FBI clearance in some cases, you must disclose any background information that you feel may surface, no matter how minor. You must give your agency information about your health, including weight! YIKES! And your finances are not protected either. You must disclose savings, checking, retirement accounts, investments, net worth, debt, and the list goes on. Your life suddenly becomes public to your social worker and your agency. Your social worker is charged with the responsibility of making sure you are able to support and raise this child appropriately. They are required to submit a home study conducted in a series of three interviews and one home visit. They will interview other members of your family and check to see you have adequate space to add another child to your household. Their recommendation is what you will need to say whether you can adopt. While your social worker is working to complete your home study, you will be working on other documents that will be used to complete your file. Some of these include: medical forms for each member of the family, certified copies of birth certificates, marriage/divorce certificates, letters from employers verifying income, income tax return copies, immigration forms, shot records for pets, police clearance letters, FBI clearance (in some cases), USCIS clearance (in all cases) and that is just a few. See what I mean by overwhelming at times?

I found that if you break the paperwork down into groups, it makes it much more manageable and you do not feel you are standing at the base of a mountain wondering if you will ever get to the top. Your social worker will be there to hold your hand every step of the way. You will find that your social worker will be a huge blessing to your life and to the process. The social worker will become your closest contact, your best friend, be a wealth of information, and aid you in bringing your child home.

The wonderful day will eventually arrive when you have everything you need for your file to be complete. You or your agency will submit your paperwork to the proper authorities and it will finally be out of your hands and on its way to wherever it is supposed to be! This is when the wait really begins. The wait times vary from program to program, be sure to consider this factor when you are deciding from where to adopt.

The wait is the hardest part of the whole process – much harder, you will find, than the mountain of paperwork!

Once you are matched with a child, who is called a referral, you will find yourself in the home stretch. It is a HUGE relief to be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Soon after that time, you will travel to bring your child home. Oh what a feeling that will be. The sweetest feeling imaginable! And suddenly, you find that all the paperwork, stress, tears, laughter, waiting, emotional roller coaster rides, and general nervousness will all disappear in a matter of seconds when your sweet child is placed in your arms. What a day of rejoicing that will be!

To be continued………………………………

Thanks for reading, Rosie.

Adoption Is NOT For Sissies! Part One

The heart of adoption began at creation. God created man and woman in his image, crowned them as “very good”, and desired a personal relationship with them. He adopted humankind as his very own. Not to manipulate, but to love. However, man disobeyed God and as a result, God eventually had to begin again. He chose Noah, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, He allowed years of slavery and then – he chose Moses. Adoption is recorded in the Bible beginning with Moses. Moses -- born into slavery, given up by his birth mother for his protection, drawn from the water by Pharaoh’s daughter and raised as a Prince of Egypt. The heart of Pharaoh’s daughter held compassion. The heart of Moses’ mother held compassion. Compassionate hearts linked together by obedience brought about an event of Biblical proportions. God used an adopted Jewish baby boy to bring His law to His people and then eventually to the Gentiles through the living Word Jesus Christ. We are adopted into God’s great plan. Adoption is Biblical and therefore significant.

God calls some people to adopt children. Whether it is because they cannot have biological children, they choose to adopt rather than have biological children, or maybe they have biological children but God moves their heart to add to their family through adoption; either way it is a superior calling. I admire those who answer this call. I have been told that adoption is not for sissies! You give birth to biological children through the reproductive system; you give birth to adopted children through the heart. Neither is easy, both are painful.

I know this, not because I have adopted, but because I have followed a longtime, but not so old friend, through the process of international adoption. Almost four years ago, her pastor husband surprised her with their plans to adopt for her fortieth birthday. She had been praying for several years that her husband’s heart would be moved to adopt. You see they already had one grown son and another in his teens, why start over? Because God’s ways are not our ways and when His Spirit convicts your heart, you have one of two choices. Obey or Disobey. They chose to obey.

I am writing this not because she needs help telling her story. She chronicled it all and I will eventually give you the link to that. I am writing this to understand the topic better myself. I have questions. Questions that I am not comfortable asking just anyone. Questions that others may have. Questions I know she can answer and desires to share. Therefore, this is first of several pieces on Adoption is Not for the Sissies.

International or Domestic Adoption?

From the beginning, the choice of whether to adopt internationally or domestically is something all adoptive parents must decide. Why choose domestic adoption over international adoption, or vice versa? These questions are valid. If you are considering adoption, in the process or adopting, or have adopted in the past, you WILL ask yourself these questions. I posed this question to my friend who has been through adoption. Her answer may surprise you.

“Let me be frank, my first thought in answering that question is that it is really none of anyone’s business; and I still, to some degree, feel that way. However, I have come to realize that part of my purpose in the world of adoption is to educate people. I once had a woman who worked where I bank ask me, “It is probably none of my business,” (you know you are in for it when the question is prefaced with that phrase), “But why would you go all the way to China to adopt a baby when they are “giving” them away on the street corners in America?” My quick-witted response was, “Because my daughter is in China.” An attempt at sarcasm actually boiled down to be the truth; my daughter was in China. We knew this and were confident in the knowledge; therefore, looking at any country other than China for our first adoption was not an option. God called us to adopt internationally from China, period.”

Did God audibly tell you to adopt? “No.”
Did God audibly tell you to adopt from China? “No.”
Then how did you know with such certainty that you had a daughter in China?

“If you are Christ Follower and have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, then you can understand our certainty. Until you experience His supernatural leading, it is almost impossible for me to explain my conviction. Because of our personal relationship with Christ on an everyday basis – communication with the Father - there was never a decision about whether we were going to adopt domestically or internationally. I am okay with answering the question and will do so to the best of my ability, but I have long since stopped defending our decision to adopt internationally instead of domestically. I will no longer explain that no child is more deserving of a loving family than another because of the color of their skin, their ethnic background, or the country they are from – all children, no matter their country of origin – deserve a family that will be theirs forever. A child is a child is a child, and they all deserve a family, both here and in other countries.”

“People have a tendency to believe that families adopt internationally because it is the “Hollywood” thing or the trendy thing to do. Let me be brutally honest, if I’m going to do something trendy, I would do things a little differently. I WOULD NOT scrimp and save every extra dime to be able to bring my child home. I WOULD NOT endure the long wait to see my child’s face or wait to travel to bring her home. I WOULD NOT subject myself to lying awake at night, crying out to God to care for her while I am on the other side of the world. I WOULD NOT let my thoughts be consumed by whether or not she is being fed, loved, held, rocked, cared for or any other basic need all children deserve. I would spend my $25,000 on an in-ground pool and a nice pair or Prada sunglasses and lounge away my carefree days To hear someone say that people are adopting because it is the “in” thing to do makes me laugh out loud. Again, I am back to educating the uneducated.”

“I believe that God has ordained adopting in my family’s life. We eat, sleep, and breathe adoption. However, I am here to tell you, adopting is one of the HARDEST journeys I have ever traveled. I have always been told, “Nothing worth having is easy.” With the exception of saving our souls, adoption is the sweetest gift God has given our family. We will always feel that we are the privileged ones to have been allowed to travel to China and bring home the daughter that was created to be ours before the very foundation of the world was laid. We are blessed. I truly believe others are missing a great blessing by not being obedient to the Father’s call and I believe that the tough choice lies in “do I adopt?” or “do I not adopt?” and not “do I adopt domestically or internationally?” Once that decision is made, you just follow your heart --but hold on for the ride of your life.”

To be continued…………………………

If you have adopted, are thinking of adopting, are in the middle of your adoption, have family members who have adopted, or like me, just have questions regarding adoption, I would love to hear what you have to say. Please feel free to express yourself.

Thanks for reading, Rosie